Bike Pirate

Ways in which bikers are like pirates.

1. A pirate without a ship is just a dude gazing forlornly at the horizon. A biker without a bike is just a dude gazing forlornly at the horizon.

2. A pirate does plunder, and make off with booty, swag, and loot. A biker does plunder, and make off with booty that he finds on the side of the road that a motorist will never see, or at least would never pull over and stop for.

3. A pirate is a freeman, who shirks country and obligation in pursuit of his own fate. Ditto for a biker. To an extent.

4. The Golden Age of Piracy came about because of widespread dissatisfaction and frustration with the oppressive treatment of sailors, indentured servants, and slaves. The Golden Age of Cycling came about because of widespread dissatisfaction and frustration with the detrimental and deleterious effects of consuming fossil fuels, and the cost thereof; the cost of upkeep, maintenance and insurance of the motor vehicle.

5. Both are subject to the whims and fancies of Mother Nature.

6. Pirates drink a lot of rum, grog, and ale. So do cyclists.

7. Similar to how pirates were privateers, buccaneers, freemen, mutineers, and mercenaries; bikers are also commuters, racers, messengers, campers, utilitarians, tourers, randonneurs, and fixies.

8. Pirates hate ninjas. Cyclists hate ninjas.

9. When there's no sailing to be done, and when there's no riding to be done, both a pirate and a biker feel and look like a dragon-slayer, when all the dragons have been slain.

10. ARRRRRRRRRRRRR!